A few people have mentioned to me that Miami isn’t up to much and I fear that they may have paid too much attention to Stephen Bloody Fry, a national treasure so highly treasured and implausibly intelligent, that you couldn’t possibly disagree with him, whether or not you’ve actually been to Miami.

Well Britain, and anyone else who holds this admittedly lovely man in too high esteem, you’ve been duped. Miami, or at least Miami Beach, is flipping wonderful.

As Fry says in the above video, the architecture really is deco, and it really is everywhere. I can’t remember having been anywhere else where one distinct architectural style was so prevalent and also so beautifully maintained. It does look like neapolitan ice cream, but last time I checked neapolitan ice cream was delicious and if you don’t want to stay in a hotel that looks like ice cream, you’re mental and your opinions are invalid.

He also seems awfully snooty about the palm trees that are all over the place, as though they give the place a tacky, faux-tropical appearance. Well Mr Stephen No Fun, it is tropical, Miami Beach used to be a coconut farm, and palm trees are perfectly good trees you old berk.


Alright, so there is a fair bit of tacky, anti-Fry, youth oriented, party vibe around the city such as this ludicrously camp, ludicrously big, beer in an oversized cocktail glass.

And everywhere you go for breakfast they play Maroon Five and Christina Aguilera really loudly.

But it really isn’t as shit as that makes it sound. It’s a good looking town and it made me and Lovisa feel really happy and tanned and good looking too. Plus, there’s wicked good wildlife at the beach.